RockMyCore

It's been over a month since I'm done with National Service.
Boy has it been that long?
It just felt like I was still in green yesterday.
Two years does that to you.

But am I happy that it's done with.

People say going through all this makes you a better person.
In all matter of fact, not all of them are true.
I'm living proof.
But I would be lying if all of em are lies either.
Irony.

But to hell with that.
I'm so done with that shit that was two years of "slavery".

I've been spending a lot of time with myself ever since then.
Especially in the sanctuary that is my room.
I've been slowly turning my room in the wonderland that I want it to be.
And getting shit done that has been on hold for the entire two years.
Been having a lot of quiet and personal time too.
To catch on up with myself and finally find my bearings and pieces.

It's a whole new world out there.
Full of pain and suffering.
Real pain and suffering.

And I can't wait.

Yes.
Life has been hectic.
October has been one hell of a month.
And I would say, the worst of this year so far.

So much has happened.
So much good, and so much sad and bad.

Well, first, school really has been a bitch.
This semester actually isn't that very bad though.
It just boils down to the fact that I still have programming to do.
Everyone in the milky way knows Gaijin and programming just do not mix.
But then, everyone also knows, I will pull through in the end.

Everyday is just a robotic routine of going through the routines...
And panicking when common tests and assignments and projects comes in.
But then again, isn't that what school is all about?

Anyway, let me start with the saddest of all shit that happened since my last post.

Joobs passed away...



It was so sudden.
I remember that day perfectly.
It was one of them mornings where I woke up pretty early naturally.
It was 6ish?
I gave him his favourite...celery.
Added in a few carrots, and refreshed the goodie pile.
Played with him for awhile, then put him back.
Added more bathing sand and was off to school!

He was happy, and being the usual crazy little hamster, forever on the wheel.

I came home, and I thought he will be at the wheel or just sleeping.
And I  couldn't find him!
Until I saw his still body on the hay.
DAMN.

I honestly have no idea why or how he died.
I just sat there for an hour thinking what I could have done wrong.
And upto now, I still couldn't think of any.
I have no idea.

So after a burial, I just left his cage there.
For days, I couldn't bring myself to clean it.

Until like a week, I finally got around to it.
My father was damn cute.
He asked if I needed help to assemble it back together.
Even now, his empty cage just sits there.

And I still long to have his rattles on the wheel in the middle of the night.



I don't want another hamster.
I don't want to go through another loss.

I don't know. Is my hectic life affecting my pets?

I can't afford to upkeep my fish tanks now too.
Cutting down to just two tanks.

Maybe I'll just start having that little herb garden that I always wanted to have.

Sigh. 
I wish I had more time, more money, and more love to share.
I WISH.

Well, that's the pinnacle of my sadness so far.
There are tons more of shit, but nah, it's not worth mentioning.
Besides, aren't sad shit supposed to be forgotten as soon as possible?

On a lighter note, I finally got around to getting something done that I've always wanted to do.
I usually need a kick to just go with my sudden impulsion and guts.
And with Miss Dorothy Tang!
So finally, Gaijin did it.
:D





Well another thing at school that has been taking up majority of my time, is dance.
Yes, in light of the upcoming musical, dancing has been somewhat of a lifeline these few weeks.
I got ballroom and stage arts side by side.
Boy am I excited!
I am still.
But my body is kinda dead?
Yeah quite dead,



The long hours of stressful school coupled by long straining hours of dancing and not much sleep has cause a ripple of effects on me.
I got the sick.

It kinda got bad.........
I actually went to get an MC.. and wasted money on my own accord on Monday.
So yeah, that's how bad it actually got.
But oh well, this weekend was a good one for me.
Power napped on both Saturday and Sunday and I kinda feel recharged for the week ahead.

It's awesome dancing latin now I would say.
For rhumba, me partner is le beautiful Miss Alicia!



It has awesome dancing with her!
I am so ecstatic to be having the opportunity to improve with her.
Haha.
She is the longest person by far, that I've been dancing with.
Awesome.
I needed that kick!
HAHAHA.




And yeah hip hop for stage arts has been awesome too.
A struggle at first, but totally getting the hang of it now.

Wanna know what's my schedule like for dance?

Monday : Ballroom.
Tuesday: Stage Arts
Weds: Both.
Thursday: Stage Arts
Sat: Both.

God bless me.

Well, I did end my hectic week days with an awesome get together with the fellow PolyForum peeps.
I will always love this bunch of people.
It's always just pure laughter and happiness whenever we meet.
And I am so lucky to have some in NYP.

We had a scrumptious dinner.





And as usual, retarded cam-whoring.








And for last night, my family actually agreed to have KFC!



Yeah, it's an extremely rare occasion to have fast food, even so delivered to the home!
All I can say is, there is still a ton of remainders in the fridge.
Might be a long long time till we order again.
HAHA!

All in all, life is still a roller-coaster.
A pretty unsuspecting one.
I just live it.
Day by day.
Enjoying the awesome downs.
Patiently waiting for the long ups.
And recovering from all the bloody nausea.



And I still love you all!
<3

Oh btw, and to you.
Yes you.

 
Yes.
It has been long.
I missed you RockMyCore.
Missed you hell of alot.

Life has been one hell of a roller coaster from the last time I was here.

There were so many occasions where I would type something out, delete all out, or just come to this new post page and just stare for hours.

There is just so much to say.
So much to pour.
YET.
So much to hide.

But you know, sometimes, I Just Don't Give A Fuck.


I have really come to a sad sincere point in my life where I don't give a shit about people anymore.
I always let myself be the one taken advantaged of.
Fuck being the nice guy.
I won't falter for this kinda shit anymore.
To all of you ass wipes out there.
(SOME OF YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE)



The only person I am gonna love more, is myself.
Period.

It's true.
Tumblr has been another close friend of mine these few months.
The ease of everything there.
And the wonderful world of visuals.
But I still love RockMyCore more.

Though my Tumblr is extremely active, I won't forget this blog.

Now, to get down to business.

I'm gonna keep this long awaited post short and sweet.

First.
I am now officially over my first year at NYP.
How time flies.
Tons of stuff happen.
Some awesome, some tragic.
BUT WE ALL GROW FROM IT YEAH?

I would say I started of on the wrong page.
As usual.
Just like ITE. I could have done better. But I let the opportunity slip right through me fat fingers.
So I really did try my best this time.
With the promise to my parents that I can still juggle work and dance at the same time.

AND GUESS WHAT I GOT...

Fuck yeah!
I ain't complaining!


At first I was like


and then I was like


and from then till now I'm like



Whoo hell yeah.

I feel great.
Eat your hearts out haters.

Gaijin can do anything he wants to do.
Watch me.

I've been such a good boy you know.
Working and studying his ass off.

So I am gonna shop like a happy kid for awhile.
I already have a long lists on wants.
:D

OH AND ONE MORE THING.

I lost all my contacts.
ALL.
So please, do send me your numbers yeah?

How did I loose my precious Omnia?
That would be for another blog post.






 RockMyCore!

I'M BACK!

I AM BACK MY LOVELY BLOG!

All right.
I'm sorry for staying away for so long.

Coming back is so hard.
Laziness, pure laziness
Tiredness too to add.

Sometimes, I don't even turn on my laptop.

IT'S JUST I FEEL SO LAZY TO DO ANYTHING LATELY.

Well, I did promise that this year would be a great year for RockMyCore.

NYP Open House had passed!
Which was the reason why I wasn't blogging for so long.


I came back home and K.O-ed every single day last week.
But it was all worth it.
And my passion for dancing has flamed up abit.

But I don't know why I just don't have that FLAME I had when I first joined.
It's lost somewhere.
Hidden.
Dormant.

But why.
I don't know.
And I'm not going to know.
But I'm going to get it to revive again!

Well besides dance, life has been good in NYP.
My grades have improved.
Well somewhat with comparisons to last Common Tests.
I got a B+ for Math yo.
Like that is damn high for my standards!
HAHA.

And I'm going to just keep aiming higher.

Oh yes about my holiday.
I went back TO Malacca.
This trip was a very pleasant yet very somber and sad one too.
My Christmas dinner was a pipping hot pot of Ba Ku Teh at midnight.
It was just lovely.

This Christmas visit was a very somber one.
Not because I was sick, but because, I got to see my cousin Raymond's and my maternal Grandmother's graves for the very first time.

It's going to be a year to Raymond's death anniversary.
I couldn't get to see him for the last time, I couldn't say goodbye, I couldn't attend the funeral either.
And finally I got to see his resting place.
I miss him.
The closest cousin I ever had.
I miss the times whenever I would go back and we would just sit at a corner and just talk about anything under the sun for hours.
I really do miss him.
:(








But finally I got to see his resting place.
I almost cried.
I finally felt at peace.
I finally was able to say goodbye.


And I also got to see my Grandmother's grave too.
She took care of me till I was a year old.
She always squealed "OOOOH NEEEEEE!"
And I would giggle and squeal in reply.
Yeah, I didn't get the chance to grow up with her.
But she took care of me when I needed it most.
And that was all that counts.

Okay happiness then.
Okay, not really.
Got sick on the way over there.
The bloody flu and sore throat and all.
GOT IT FROM THE MOTHER!
Anyways, with all the shit, I was either on the bed, on a dining table, or in a car.
Or was shopping.
HAHA.
I couldn't be bothered with the bloody fever, throat, and flu and just ate my fill.
Devil, assam pedas, belachan and all.
I just ate to my heart's content, with bloody phlegm and all.

I just needed to restock for the year of one of my favorite comfort foods.
And to end the year with a gastronomic blast!



This trip was just a perfect ending for the year.
It was meant for closure.
And happiness.

AND OH MY BLOODY SHIT.
I JUST FOUND OUT I LEFT MY POUCH FULL OF ALL MY THUMBDRIVES IN SCHOOL.


FUCK.


SERIOUSLY.


I GOT NO MORE MOOD TO DO ANYTHING ALREADY.


AAARGH.

I hope I can find them tomorrow.
I really do hope.


IF NOT...




DIE.


GOOD NIGHT!