Oh yes.
I has been a sad Chinese New Year.
But not everything was a sad affair.
I agree.
We had happy times too!
The one thing I look forward to, when I get back there is FOOD!
Especially my Ah Ee's FOOD!
She is one of the BEST COOKS IN THE WORLD for me!
And she can cook like no one's business.
And that is just a mini preview of an awesome gastronomic affair.
I was just too busy eating to snap away with the camera.
Desole..
And something else I look forward to..
Great things come in small packages yeah?
I do agree.
This tiny little bowl of THE BEST CHENDOL IN THE WORLD always takes my worries away for 15 minutes. (That's how long the after taste longs for)
And the canines!
That's Dexter, on the left and Mothy on the right.
Dexter is the new addition ( not actually new, I just haven't exactly been back in a LONG time ) to my cousin's family.
And Mothy is Ah Ee's trusted companion.
Well,talikng about my Ah Ee.
Here she is!
Forgive me..my mouth is full with her her food!
I love her so much!
And I am so worried for her.
It's a fact, she is old.
She lives alone.
And she still works and cooks for a living.
I want her to finally put her troubles down and relax for GOOD.
I don't want her to be slogging out anymore.
I don't want her doing hard work.
She has been working for as long as my mother's young days and I think it is time she stopped.
It's time for her to enjoy life.
She never has.
She has never taken a holiday.
She has never left Malaysia.
And she has had a very hard life.
She is such a strong woman.
And now all she has in Mothy by her side.
I want to drag her back to Singapore.
My family wants to too!
But she won't leave.
She doesn't want to leave Mothy behind.
If I could, I would bring both she and Mothy back.
And give them a good life.
But it's so hard.
She wont budge.
I'm so sorry to say this, but when Mothy passes on, I am going to go there and bring her back home.
I would give her my room if she wants it.
And give her the Tv, let her watch what she wants.
Give her the kitchen..let her cook all she wants!
Give her a wonderful garden!
She can grow all her herbs and flowers.
She can go out and make friends!
I just want to give her a good life, though I on my own cannot do that.
But I will try.
But wait..I just realized!
She has no passport!
HAHAHAHAHA!
Doesn't matter!
I'll make one for her!
I love her so much.
And it pains me to see her there, living alone.
And I would do anything in my power to give her happiness.
If only life was as happy and easy.
Dear Raymond.
I went to Melaka for most of the sole purpose to get my closure.
The closure to the fact that you are forever gone.
I never got the chance to say goodbye properly.
In fact, I never even got the chance to say goodbye at all.
I never cherished the last time you were around.
And I HATE myself for it.
You were the only cousin I was close to.
The only one I could talk to about anything.
You were always there to send those encouraging messages.
And those little gifts you never fail to give.
And you were getting married!
I was so ecstatic!
It eats me to my core, that you are gone..
That it was all so sudden..
Just out of normalcy, one plain phone call.
"Raymond is gone"
I'm not a person to express my feelings easily..
But tears roll down my face as I type this.
I just don't understand.
Why this has to happen.
And why to you.
The fact of the matter is, I will never know why.
I will never ever now.
They say God's plan is never ours.
And yes, I still just can't grasp that logic.
I just can't.
CNY pretty much went by in a blur.
I couldn't get closure.
Amusingly, your grave on earth isn't ready yet couz!
They are still choosing a memory verse for your tombstone.
And so I couldn't visit.
And so yes, I will only get closure when I see your final resting place.
I'm happy that you are in a better place.
But, HAHA, I am still human, and I am of course sad that I can only see you again there.
My heart will not find peace until I see your grave.
It's the least I can do.
Till we meet again my beloved cousin.
